I found my own anwer to this -ex NASA you are quite right - a supermassive black hole is not lethal until it kills you- certainly not at the event horizon.
Which black hole could a human enter without being spaghettified?
Answer: The supermassive black hole, because the tidal force is far less than what a
human normally experiences on the surface of Earth. That raises the question that as a
space traveler, you could find yourself trapped by a supermassive black hole unless you
knew exactly what its size was before hand. You would have no physical sensation of
having crossed over the black hole's Event Horizon before it was too late.